Category Archives: Fitness

Activity tracker hates me

My activity tracker hates me


Activity tracker hates me

That’s me after a run. Okay, it’s not me, I’m lazy, haven’t run since the last time I was about to miss a bus, and I bought a Jawbone Up a few months ago to motivate me. I’ve since come to the sad conclusion that my fitness tracker hates me.


Well. At first I had it set to nag me every 30 minutes if I hadn’t moved. This was called an idle alert and it vibrated the  bracelet helpfully to remind me I was being a lazy cow. Except that I wasn’t really being lazy at all. I was on a train, or a bus, or a deadline. The problem was that it didn’t know that my lack of physical activity wasn’t always down to Eastenders and Netflix, but most of the time I was doing things that paid for luxuries like a smart phone with a Jawbone app that nags me.

I soon turned that function off. It made me feel  guilty when I WAS being lazy and  just annoyed me.

I loved the nifty sleep function. I really like getting geeky and seeing how  much sleep I’ve had, dream sleep, deep sleep and light sleep. As I expected, most of my sleep is light, which is  my beloved’s farts always wake me up! Its a great function…until it starts nagging you to go to bed. “Smart Coach noticed you’ve been going to bed late recently” and “Try to go to sleep before 9.53 to get enough sleep”

I’m 45! It’s a while since anyone’s told me  it’s past my bedtime.

Even better, if I do defy smart coach, it tells me off. “You missed your bedtime!”


Another reason my activity tracker hates me is that I don’t do 10,000 steps a day. I mean, sometimes I do. But you know, rain, cold, work, Hollyoaks. So it tells me how many steps I do and helpfully adds, “You haven’t been  your normal active self today”

Smart Coach is a sarcastic cow.

If my heart rate is a bit high when I wake up, it helpfully suggests that I might like to drink more water, do some yoga or go to bed early. I was probably just having one of those awful nightmares about spiders. Or my ex husband.

So why can’t I just take it off and stamp on it? It’s because when I do hit my step target, sleep for eight hours and drink eight glasses of water, I feel like I’ve achieved something. Until smart coach tells me I missed bedtime AGAIN…

If you want to torture yourself with your lack of activity or erratic sleep habits, find out more here….



gorgeously full fat

This Woman Was Breathless Walking Around The Shops. What She Did Next Will Make You Gasp!

gorgeously full fat


It won’t really. I just fancied writing a blog title that sounded like clickbait!

I can put your mind at rest if you were thinking that my sudden breathless episode was a Kettle Chip and cheese related heart attack. Nope, it was a wine and party food related gastritis episode which has gone now. The next morning I got up and went for a walk, did three miles or so in zero temperatures and I was perfectly fine.

No more wine or vol au vents for a while. Well, maybe on Wednesday night…

I couldn’t sleep last night and I planned to write a “day in the life” type post about what it’s really like being fat, when you live a normal kind of life and not a tabloid imagined gorge fest.

So here’s today, warts and all. The reasons I want to get healthy again… This isn’t a whine and I’m not beating myself up. This is just how it is.

Do I really have to get out of bed?

I fully intended to hitch a lift to the gym with Moley at 7am. Had gym stuff all laid out. Then I didn’t sleep til about 2.30 and by 7am getting out into -3 cold and frost wasn’t top of my to do list. I stayed in bed a bit longer instead.

The first thing I do every day when I wake up is take a Lanzoprazole pill. These are for the gastritis and mostly they keep it under control. I really want to come off them as I think they make my IBS worse and I don’t want to be on them for the rest of my days! For now I’m taking them though. I phoned another prescription in this morning because if I run out and don’t take them I get terrible rebound pains that hurt so much I have to lie down and stay still for up to two hours. That’s boring.

I whizz up a pre gym protein shake for breakfast… My first one. Got them from Juice plus, the vanilla one is quite nice actually. Was expecting to grimace a bit.

Putting on my gym outfit meant issues. My sports bra won’t do up anymore, partly because I’ve put on weight, partly because it’s knackered and partly down to hormones making me go up a bra size. No running on the treadmill for me today then. I did feel a bit relieved, I hate running. Putting trainers on always means breathing in as my tummy gets in the way. Part of the logistics of being fat is finding ways to do things up or get things on and off while breathing in and squishing the fat bits.

Fat girl in gym session shocker…

I get the bus into the town and then walk the 15-20 minutes to the gym. Heard a Hi energy class going on as I walked in, really wished I had the fitness and coordination for it. I’ve done a few classes but even things like yogalates are hard for me, I can’t hold all the poses and I struggle to support my weight on one arm!

The gym was OK. I usually zone out with the iPod but I noticed a skinny girl giving me that look, the one you get when you’re fat and doing something skinny people do. I ignored it, and then shot the fat girl who sat next to me on the stationary bikes a look of solidarity…

Ten minutes into my cycling, my abdomen goes into spasm with no warning and I have to stop for a bit, concentrate hard and once the spasm subsides carry on. That’s IBS! I’m used to it and grit my teeth on the bike; at least I’m sitting down! It puts paid to the idea of finishing with 10 minutes on the cross trainer though… I wait until there nobody about in the changing room and… Well TMI. I don’t want to risk getting caught out on the walk back into town…

I look at myself in the gym mirror… Can’t help wishing my t shirt fitted better. I spent too much time pulling it down every time it rode up. When I wasn’t trying to ignore my knees hitting my squishy tum. Which gets in the way, as it does on the leg press too. And the back extension.

“Are you looking at my basket? “

In town I pop to get a few bits and as usual part of me always thinks I’m judged on what’s in my basket. OK so today it was eggs, bacon, low fat sausages, mushrooms, broccoli and butternut squash. But it isn’t always! I’m sure nobody gives a crap what I’m buying but if there’s crisps and goodies on there I almost expect a tut.

I get the bus home, put the drying on, make lunch, call the Spa to arrange my trip that Moley treated me to for Christmas, and decide that the windows look filthy so I’m going to clean them. Hmm. I have to reach across furniture to get to them and when I do the outside I have to reach up and scrub. The decision to clean the windows aggravates my back and my shoulder. I decide to have a shower and leave the hoovering till tomorrow.

I fire up the laptop to do some admin, I’m not supposed to be working but I have unpaid invoices I need to follow up and I planned to start working on ideas for my writing business next year, as they were keeping me awake last night. I realise I’m sitting at an awkward angle and my back starts aching but there’s stuff all I can do as there’s no room for a better desk in our flat. I dream of a decent size house!!

My confirmation email comes through for the spa day, do I want a normal or XL robe? I tick XL. And book a massage…

So many bras, so little choice

I finally make progress on the work stuff and also sign up as a distributor for juice plus. Yay! I decide to look for a sports bra online. Over 1000 bras, only 9 sports bras in my size. Both the ones I like are out of stock. I go for my third choice and that’s going to cost me £40 and take 14 days…

I cook tea when Moley gets home. Haven’t felt too much like hoovering up Christmas chocolates today, and dinner is mostly the butternut squash and broccoli I bought earlier, plus some chicken. I do give in to a few Lindt balls later. Damn they are good.

I try to read “Wheat Belly” later, as someone had told me her IBS and gastritis cleared up after giving up wheat and sugar. Toying with trying wheat free, just to see if it helps. The IBS settled this afternoon, sometimes it does, other times I resort to immodium. I try not to take the pills too often.

I’m knackered by 9.30 and in bed by 10, writing this before I forget. Really tired now. That’s what 4.5 hours sleep does to my brain.

Gorgeously Full Fat and knackered

That’s my day. My starting point for getting healthy. I don’t have anything seriously wrong but what I do have impacts on my daily life and I don’t want it to anymore…. It’s also an exercise in how much my weight affects me in little ways all the time. It doesn’t stop me doing things but it affects how I do them. It surprised me if I’m honest. that even someone like me who’s plus size positive actually thinks about things like what strangers in shops and gyms think of me. Guess I need a boost of confidence too…

I’d love to know if any of this resonates with you??

Night night xx


Writing the book


So how was your Christmas?

Mine has been lovely. Family, friends, presents, food, drink, more wine, more food, more chocolate… I’m beached.

I should be off to sleep now but I’ve had stuff rattling around in my brain and I think it needs to get out. I worried myself today. I went into the town with Moley and I was caught out by breathlessness. I found it so hard to get my breath, and yeah I know it was cold, and I was walking quite fast up a slight incline, but it was horrible.

I’ve also had palpitations and dizziness in the last few months. I’m sure it’s nothing; it’s been a stressful year. But I do need to sort it out.

So upgrade 2015 is still being planned. I remember a while ago I was looking in the shops and online for a really good, comprehensive guide to getting healthy, and there just isn’t one. Of course there’s a gazillion diet books, fitness books, books on positive thinking, yoga or nutrition. There nothing for the forty something who just wants to feel better though. Just as well I’m a writer then eh?

I’m still not sure how I’ll do it but I am going to talk about it here and hopefully you can keep me on track?

I’m two weeks and three days into taking the Juice Plus and it’s done amazing things to my skin, so much so that I’ve got Moley taking them for his lifelong eczema too, and they are having a good effect after just a week. I’ll start myself on the protein shakes in the new year, I got a free sample of those and they are supposed to give you lots of energy. There’s a diet and fitness plan too but I’m not really interested in that.

I’m probably going to start distributing the products too. I’m a bit wary because I know someone else who has started selling them, and is posting a lot about it on Facebook…and I feel weird about using my blog to promote stuff.

I wouldn’t do it unless I believed they worked, and I’m someone who has taken so many different supplements over time it’s ridiculous. I’m also crap at sales. I got sacked from Peter Lord shoe shop in Ipswich when I was a 15 year old Saturday girl, for not selling my target number of shoe polishes and insoles, every month. I was great at getting the squirmy kids to sit still and have their feet measured but selling shoe cream? Not so much.

It doesn’t cost much to join the scheme and ideally I’m supposed to recruit others but I’d mainly be doing it to get mine a bit cheaper.

Anyway, it’s late and I’m waffling. Today did scare the crap out of me though.I hate feeling unfit so it’s back to the gym for me on Monday. The time has come to start looking after myself. And writing the book I really wanted to read…

Night all…

PS: Writing this on a tablet, in the dark, at almost midnight had definitely given me some laughs with the predictive text. If you spot a typo I’ve missed, you’ll know why!


No More ‘D’ Word!

If you think that the only way to get healthy is deprive yourself of all the c’s (chocolate, cake, crisps, cheese and Chardonnay) – this week’s guest poster, the lovely Kerry, can tell you otherwise. She was diagnosed with diabetes earlier this year and had to change her lifestyle – but after having the same experiences as most of us when she tried dieting, she decided to take another route.

Kerry has got fit and healthy by being kind to herself, listening to her body, and taking it slowly…I’ll let her explain.


I love food, especially cheese! Cheese & a LOT of other food has made me fat. I got fed up with being fat so decided to do something about it. I won’t bore you, but like most curvy girls I’ve tried every diet under the sun. Clearly they all failed! I always ended up even fatter after each diet as I wanted to eat everything I had been depriving myself of. I’m also an emotional eater, so the mere hint of stress and there I would be with a tub of Ben & Jerry’s or a slab of cheddar.

It took its toll on my body, I was diagnosed as being diabetic among other things, so in January this year after the usual Christmas/New Year pig out I decided to change my lifestyle. I also had a goal as I was marrying my lovely hubby in April & didn’t want to look like a roly poly blancmange in my wedding dress.

I looked at various local gyms but as soon as I rang FitClub I knew it was the place for me. I spoke to Zoe, the owner & she invited me to go for an initial look around, chat & if I wanted a quick & painless fitness test. The gym is not part of a chain, I would describe it as compact and bijou! There will never be more than 5 people working out at the same time as you. The group sessions are mostly for ladies, different times on different days run by Zoe or her trusty sidekick Teresa. Neither of them are young gym bunnies, thank god, they are all women who have battled with their weight (I’ve seen photographic evidence!) and therefore are incredibly understanding about wobbly bits!

What I do…

I see Zoe once a week for an hourly Personal Training session (PT) in which she weighs me & then puts me through my paces. It is hard work, I sweat like a pig but feel fantastic afterwards. She occasionally measures the wobbly stuff – I have managed to lose 15cm off my waist – go me! But the old bingo wings are taking a while longer as only 2cm off so far. I do like to have a little moan whilst exercising but Zoe has a fantastic non bullying attitude which encourages you to keep going without making you feel like you are going to keel over!  I also go to a group session that Teresa runs. There are 3 other ladies who are lovely & we have a good old natter while exercising. Zoe also runs Pilates classes, which I go to, again another group where we have a laugh & exercise. If you would have told me at the beginning of the year I would be exercising 3 times a week I would have spat my ball of Mozzarella at you!


But my lifestyle changes have worked! I’ve lost just over 2 stone. From my post Christmas weigh in at home it is actually over three stone. I’ve been eBaying my old clothes to make a few pennies to pay for more clothes. A lot of people have commented that I’ve lost weight, but more importantly I feel better in myself. I’ve dramatically cut down my cheese intake, something I NEVER thought would happen. Hubby & I have reduced our portion sizes as we were eating enough for a rugby team between us. We are eating much healthier, particularly me, being veggie was making me lazy, hence the cheese addiction!

Hard Work!

Some days are hard work, especially when all I really want is an Indian take-away or macaroni cheese. I do let myself have them if I really want them, and a tipple or two at the weekends if I fancy it. I’m doing it at my pace, i.e. I may have a bad week but I get back on track. I’m only human & have failed too many diets to use the “d” word again.

I know how important the exercise is as early in the Summer I put my back out. I was miserable as I couldn’t even put my own socks on (poor hubby). I really wanted to pig out as I was bored and fed up. I didn’t want to move to the loo unless I was desperate, so not a hope of leaping around on the cross trainer! I missed exercise, something I NEVER thought I would have said! I missed the social aspect of the classes too, as they are now a fun part of my week. I have been seeing a Chiropractor for years but he only ever gave my back a quick fix, it would still take days or weeks to get back to “normal”. I went to see Zoe who already knew all about my back & put me on light exercise duty with exercises I could easily do at home.

I will be carrying on with my exercise sessions, my much healthier lifestyle and (don’t tell Zoe) my naughty take-aways. As you can see from the pic I’m never going to be a skinny minny. I will be yippee skippee if I got to a size 16 & can shop wherever I want, which is where I am heading. I’m totally realistic and know this will take months, there’s no quick fix. I’m no longer a miserable size 24 getting out of breath going up the stairs, my health problems have improved dramatically and I’m much happier in myself.

Believe in yourself lovelies as you are the only one that can help you get to where you want to be.

Fluffy hugs

Kerry x

Big plug for Zoe –